Basketball isn't the only sport with a version of "Madness." Nope, running has it, too. And the number of cases of our running Madness increase in March and April, just like basketball. Ours is caused by an increase in the number of daylight hours and a rise in ambient temperature. If many of the following statements apply to you, you may be suffering from an acute case of Runner's Madness.
- You have tried Salted Caramel GU as a topping for your ice cream
- You can shoot a snot rocket cleanly without even breaking stride
- You stretch while waiting in line
- You've named the knot in your glute
- You know every bathroom and drinking fountain within 10 miles of your house
- You know exactly what time they unlock the doors to open your favorite coffee shop
- Your motto is "March miles bring April smiles"
- You think people should be fined for yelling, "Run Forrest Run!"
- You not only know everyone at FLEET FEET, but also what days they work
- You own more "highlighter"-colored apparel than you did in the 80's
- You routinely discuss the number of miles you've gotten out of your shoes
- You can change out of layers of sweaty spandex in your car in under 60 seconds
- You plan a run to see as many STL250 cakes as possible
- You know how important NipGuards are
- You love the pain of foam rolling
- You turned your spring race into the family vacation
- You can, and have, relieved yourself in unconventional places
- You've become an amateur meteorologist so you can properly plan your weekly runs
- You have more running shoes than toenails
- You notice every hill when driving around town
- Your race fees and travel expenses are figured into your monthly budget
- You get excited when your birthday lets you move up into the next age bracket
- You immediately clench your fists whenever you see the words "Locating Satellites"
- Your instant reaction to every twinge is, "Oh, no! I've got a stress fracture!"
- You've read this far and now realize you look like a bobble head because you've been nodding in agreement
If you believe you have a case of the Madness, welcome to the club. I prescribe a visit to the next FLEET FEET social run
to get a few miles in with some kindred spirits. It won't really cure anything, but it'll help you find others enjoying the same affliction. And if you don't yet have the bug, catch it!
Good Luck and Happy Racing!